My friend’s poetry!

Scheherazade

With her raven black hair,
She tells the tales
Of many men
That left her to wail
Of strange bazaars
And rotten guitars
Scheherazade smiles despite her mars

Whose eyes could be so beautiful and so free?
Whose ears could hear
The twig snap
In the furthest corners of
What you thought
Were the darkest hollows
Of your heart

She listens more than she does tell
All the while
You are in love with her, pell-mell
And Scheherazade simply sits, draped amply across a chair
With a knowing smile
Upon her mein,
A twinkle in her eyes, you may glean,
If you lean in and listen deeply,
Inhale the stories
She has kept
Like burning incense
In a forest fire
You must detect
The tales of love
She tells
For they are for you
And your ears alone

Were you worried?
She says, as she knowingly sidles up to you.
I’ve loved you,
Just as you’ve loved me too!
As the Moon and stars
Begin to melt
She reminds you
that she still remains there.

~NF (Nathan Fernandez)

EXPERIENCE

26.3.22

– Limit idea, vanishing concept
– Delirious rhetoric
– Fundamental aporia
– prosody
– galvanism
– Irritating life
– Acentred thinking
– Intensive deformations
– alloplastic adaptation
– Determining subjective possibilities
– The life of ideas and the idea of life
– Stratifying life
– Determining subjective possibilities
– The organic machine
– The collective personality
– Biopolitical regulation

– Distinguish:
Fatigue
&
Lethargy

27.3.22

– I wanna stop torturing myself.
Can you help me?

– Distinguishing magma & lava:
Yes! This IS good enough.

– Why do you have a fever, Joe?

– Ultra-slow motion
Vs.
Ultra slow-motion

– Increasing quality by increasing quantity
Vs.
Increasing quantity by increasing quality

– After all this, do you still want LSD, Joe!?

– O GOD! I’ve mastered the art of staying still and prolonging things – time is losing track of me!

– A fantasy to fulfill all your realities
AND
A reality to fulfill all your fantasies

– Just doing, without thinking what you want

– The esoteric club of pronto-men

– Time is gonna return with a vengeance, and I’m gonna get raped!

28.3.22

– The problem with most people is that they are too sane!
3 ways to respond:
1. Radical theory
2. Use psychedelics
3. Make counter-cultural major decisions (work, partner & location)

3 stages of individuation:
1. Conformity/childhood – shaped by context
2. Reactionary/adolescence – rebelling against context
3. Creative/adulthood – independent of context!

Call to irrationality – against fear (in the form of money, morality & institutions)

– My language is a moving image

– zester
– carapace
– miscegenation
– trepan
– Alogical intervallic difference
– vespertine
– Björk
– Georg Trakl
– Lycanthropic vectors of impatience
– Henry Flynt
– veramusement; brend
– Concept art; anti-art activism; cognitive nihilism
– Dark Enlightenment
– Neo-reaction
– Post-capitalism
– unsublatable
– xeno-communication
– Positive death
– Undead agency
– hyperstition
– dividual
– Kathy Acker
– Theological sentimentalities ~ mythemes
– Transcendental miserablism
– twitted
– leftish
– suborn

– There are 3 levels of concern which are pulling me apart:
1. Social chores
2. Personal health
3. Ultimate matters
The tension is very real indeed! And I am tending to the more extreme vectors…
Where is this all gonna end?!

29.3.22

– 3 responses to this hard existence:
1. Get busy with “life”
2. Escape into a trance
3. Wallow in misery
What about doing your bit to make things better?? 🤪
Mix all – 1/3rd each!

– 3 different modalities of human life:
1. Social/institutional
2. Personal/relational
3. Cosmic/mystical
Mix all – 1/3rd each!

– Survive WITHOUT sacrifice
Adapt WITHOUT compromise

– Is it better to succeed at something petty, or fail at something great?

30.3.22

– Masochistic delectation
– Dismembered marionettes
– Atheist religions
– Boarish public
– stertorous
– stridulation

31.3.22

– tenebrous
– suffragette
– amatory
– decongeal
– pithecanthropoid
– amoebal
– ichor
– The invisible Sade

– politesse
frisson
Genteel poverty
canard

– Time seems to stand still, but it DOES move (albeit very slowly), and it WILL come to an end!

– The billionaire pornographer is the masked vigilante

– Life is an erotic horror show

– Fantasies of insanity

– Anonymous tip

– In Chthulhu, we live, move and have our being!

– Family trauma & genetic damage

– The ideal problem

– Then the CALL came, and everything changed!

– Catalyzing freak events

– I found angel hair on my body

– Weaponized boredom

– Decisively attack all the strings at once – Thaddeus Hogarth

– missive
greenhorn

– Hold on to your chair, as if you’re sitting on a roller-coaster…!

1.4.22

– vesanias
peremptory
autoscopy
Dynamized muscular lyricism
skein
Genuflecting in supernatural meditations
Wild mathematical anger
catachreses
pancalism
anacoluthons
alacrity
gid
Complexual synthesis
backformation
phylogeny
nonplussed
colonnade
peristyle
convoluted
turgescent
arrondissement
nave
funereal
stalagmite; stalactite
boxwood
boxholder
epaulet
lapel
beribboned
kermis
rubicund
cupola
caboose
squireen
secouristes

2.4.22

– randomizer

– The hourglass, cigarette & flower

4.4.22

– acerbic

– Metaporn

– She’s whispering in an alien tongue 😝!

– Still on the climb phase

– Zero Fucks Given
+
Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck
=
Zero gives a fuck!

– “Every cell in your body wants to blow it all up, and see what happens. That’s who you really are!” – Yellowjackets

– They must be “high”, right!?
Can anyone do this…, when “sober”?? 🤔

5.4.22

– Waiting for life

– Substancing abuses

– Tap on the hourglass to fully empty it

– Pataphysics

– Non-ethics – the ordinary/victim/minority

– Radicalizing the radical

– Concept cores

– From SciFi to PhiFi

7.4.22

– Angela Carter

– mummery
cosset
peal
bruin
fey
bricolage
tattle
chapbook
Post avant-garde
Self-published; small-press

– And you thought you’ve already been through Hell……! 😝

– banshee

– This is NOT masturbation, this is something ELSE!

– The more you benumb yourself to the common kinda pain, you will enter into more of this kinda pleasure

– Substances, language, gore
Ratings:
Distinguish A & R

– “Now if you’ll excuse me, I got 2 more dead people waiting for me!”

– Just breathe, baby. Say yes to new life.

9.4.22

– 2 voids are better (not greater) than 1!

– auto-fiction
brumous
recondite
arcane
sedulous
Re-reading & unbecoming
The disinterred text
Parentheses & interpolations
reliquary
grimoire
coda
elision
Coign of vantage
The decadent review
Internecine conflict
asymptote

– desultory
– portmanteau
– Professional beauties

10.4.22

– Distinguish:
Sun Ra
&
Sun O)))

11.4.22

– peat
– recto & verso
– pied-a-terre
– demitasse
– faux-naif
– dryad
– Intentional existence
– The grammatical >> the logical >> the real!

12.4.22

– R&R
funambulism

– Just try not to change anything
welcome to my room

– Sleepovers aren’t for sleeping!
Is that real snow or something else altogether?

– you gonna do all that to yourself
Fainting into dream pleasure

– Can you show me what it is like to be touched by smoke?

– How did that plant sprout from that rod?

– The mirror is a very thin veil indeed!

– Permanent consequences

13.4.22

– The great indoors

– The brutal dandy

– Criminalizing genius

– RAVEL the penelopean fabric

– Pleasure trail >> pleasure trial >> pleasure travail

– Saints of Nihil

– Sensuous criticism and hedonistic perversity

– Bezerkely
filigree

– From depression to decadence

– Charles Bernheimer

14.4.22

– 1 step forward, 1 step back
Is that the same as going around in circles?

– Azazel
Azathoth

– The tent of meeting remains in the midst of all your uncleannesses!

– “In the harsh light of the desert, these things are stripped bare to the life and love of God. In this light we can see the true weight and cost of saying no to God and each other.” – Rowan Williams on the Levitical scapegoat

15.4.22

– For this day, unto us has been given the corpse of GOD!
Good Friday, Philip Mainländer & Burning Man

– Debjani & Partha

– pigtail
curlicues
odeum

– Kim Kierkegaardashian

– My God! My God! Why have I forsaken you?

– elenchus
– doggerel

16.4.22

– trompe-l’oeil
– demimondaine
– “That trumpery hope which lets us dupe ourselves.”
– Unearthly characterizations
– Inhuman beauty
– Other-worldly analysis
– Poison-pen letters

17.4.22

– Josef Mitterer

– “If you were married to someone else, you’d be so fucking bored, you’d kill yourself!”

– Echo echo echo

18.4.22

– “The smell of nevermind at midnight, the Greeks had a word for that!”

– Being predicable
Circular grounding
Cancel culture

– Frenzy killing
ICU ~ Eye See You!
perp; vic

REFLECTIONS

4.1.22

– I am your drug,
I am your insanity,
I am your salvation! 😈

5.1.22

– tripalium
– wend
– Arbeit macht frei
– factitious
– sylph
– The literary & the literal reality
– pleonastic
– curlicues
– chalet
– ubiquitize
– Spread fan
– frieze

6.1.22

– The biggest indicator of the fucked-upness of this world is in the great difficulty of making a decent living from the pursuit of one’s unique vocation.

– Just after I finished watching 3 episodes of “Dickinson” (Apple TV series), I got a call from a family member, reprimanding me for posting inappropriate texts in a WhatsApp group… 🤪

7.1.22

– Why is how important you are to me, so important for you?
Is this (what they call) love?

– Eternal malcontent
– From slaves without masters to masters without slaves
– ubuesque
– dacha

8.1.22

– A female poet ~ a male lesbian
😅
I told you I was a freak!
😈

– The first 3 episodes of Dickinson were amazing, but the next 3 fell flat!
Was it because I was stoned for the former and sober for the latter?
No!
Because the next 2 were again awesome, and I was not stoned……

– shippers

10.1.22

– A very slow and very painful extinction awaits the human race! And the most tragic thing is, it’s all our fault.

11.1.22

– Paul Thomas Anderson
&
Anthony Paul Smith

12.1.22

– Intense love
AND
Intense hate
AND
Intense lust
NOW that is what I call LIFE!

– Thomaz Szaz = jazzy
Baby Metal
Ghoul Writer

– Will you carry ~ marry ~ bury me?

– From erective to ejaculative to orgastic potency

– What we really want is the freedom to be unhappy

18.1.22

– How can a nihilist be self-righteous?

20.1.22

– Life & death
~ Sex & orgasm
~ Nausea & vomiting
~ Eating & shitting
~ Anger & violence
~ Desire & indulgence
~ Labor & delivery
~ Pain & pleasure

– The X factor!

– Life <–> literature <–> criticism
Poetry, Hölderlin & Heidegger
Fiction, Sade & Blanchot
Xxx, Immanuel & Joseph! 😈

21.1.22

– Can I touch your other breast while you feed the baby with this one?

– The trip within the trip within the trip

– Paperless warranty
derring-do

22.1.22

– perfidy
– peccary ~ skunk pig
– maw
– “I am not unique, I am double!”
– “I am not a dog, I am a wolf”

23.1.22

– repast
– manitous
– From furious to ferocious
– dissimulation
– omnibus
– Perfect ambiguity
– petrel
– Indignant complacency
– whinyard
– Fiesta bull
– impulsion
– ensemble

– Sometimes, the house is alive!

– Why haven’t my eyes exploded yet?!

– apperception
Rhadamanthys

29.1.22

– Isidor Ducasse
cretinize

31.1.22

– Irrational numbers
– The mathematics of uncertainty
– heterotopias
– ornaic

– aposiopesis
decanal
finé

– The imploding ego
Vs.
The exploding Man

– The magnetic force between Dipreesh is the driving power in my orgiastic work!

– “Forget all those numbers, Patch!” – Australian Open 2022 men’s singles final (Nadal Vs. Medvedev) commentary
The teleological suspension of the ethical!

– Batman (Nadal)
Vs.
Superman (Medvedev)
Dawn of History!

1.2.22

– “Kindness is hypocrisy!” – Leland Townsend

– recusant
Sovereign passivity
ret(roactive)con(tinuity)

3.2.22

– petulant/querulous

8.2.22

– récit
batrachian
baobab
basalt
immure
spackle

11.2.22

– seraglio
peccary

12.2.22

– Day-trippers
Retail therapy

13.2.22

– flaneur
Black swan
Anti-fragility

15.2.22

– The luminous night of the flesh

18.2.22

– fife

19.2.22

– turgid ~ tumid
put-upon

20.2.22

– antipode
oneiric
charger (horse)
wizened
pincers
vegetalism
impassivity

21.2.22

– புனை
மெய்நிகர்
தொல்லியல்

22.2.22

– epithalamium
volucrary
arachnean
homothesis
fabulation

23.2.22

– churlish

25.2.22

– concierge

26.2.22

– reservists

28.2.22

– perm

6.3.22

– tarp
drophead
“8 minutes is too long!”

– tauromachy
toreros

– Tanglish – why do I hate the mingling of languages (in colloquial usage) so much?

– What is the relevance or significance of (standing up for) the national anthem in the cinema theater, in today’s globalized world?

– Shameless self-loathing – The unredeemable

8.3.22

– NOW you know WHY you do it, Joe!

– Beata Undine

– Long, slow, undulating

17.3.22

– Minimal leakage
All the different feelings!
Courage is essentially public
Season of the witch – you gotta pick up every stitch
T(-Re)xxx
Make it twitch
If you wanna spit fire, then you must swallow it first!

– Volcano + lava = explosion
Volcano + explosion = lava
Lava + explosion = volcano
1 + 2 = 3 – 2 = 1

18.3.22

– What if you lived like you had all the time in the world!?

– Prayers for deliverance

19.3.22

– Sink into that chair
OMG! What are they doing to each other??
My time has almost come

20.3.22

– MEOW!
The pussy roars