RANDOM

29.1.20

– Mr. Negativiti – becoming a purveyor of evil (the gloomy, the dangerous and the useless)!
Aesthetic violence

– bathetic
totemic

– Movies:
“யுத்தம் செய்”
I don’t agree with Bharadwaj Rangan that this is one of Mysskin’s top 3 films – it’s nowhere near “ஓநாயும் ஆட்டுக்குட்டியும்” & “பிசாசு”.
Extreme conditions >> brutalization of the human, and the humanization of the brutal…!
Was my decision to read a lot of reviews/spoilers before deciding to watch his latest film “Psycho” a good one?
How do I distinguish between me rightly judging a film that I dislike as a mediocre one, and a film that is actually very good (or even great) which I am not sophisticated enough to appreciate? E.g. “துப்பறிவாளன்”
Are surrealism and magical realism the same?
Great filmmakers can & do make bad movies too! 😉

– Mr. Robot (completed series) – recaps from USA Network, YouTube reviews, articles from entertainment/culture websites, interviews with the creator & cast, thematic analysis & philosophical interpretations…

– My life is somewhat like Nick Kyrgios’s temperament nowadays! 🤪

30.1.20

– Is my current lifestyle, or my previous one, more in line with my own (human) nature?
How do I know??
And is there any real/essential “nature” at all in the first place?!

– Chores, spirituality and entertainment
Is it better to have 3 kinds of days, or all 3 kinds of activities on everyday?

1.2.20

– Integrating empirical analysis & radical critique
Reification & alienation
Ideological mystification
Realism & romanticism
borough; burgess
Reading against the grain

3.2.20

– The pastor as confessor
acolyte; lector
The pious poor
ellipsis
collect (n.)

4.2.20

– Addiction as achievement!

5.2.20

– Perverse logic
meretricious
complexification

18.2.20

– Misery porn

20.2.20

– diaphoretic
Naturalized weeds
estival

21.2.20

– CAA, NPR, NRC
Septuagesima, sexagesima, quinquagesima

22.2.20

– Tragic laughter
Spiritual consequences
Anti-humanist anthropology
Unproductive expenditures

– Crucial fascinations:
1. Bonhoeffer (a pacifist) attempts to assassinate Hitler
2. Nietzsche (a nihilist) faints while trying to protect a horse being beaten

24.2.20

– retrenchment

25.2.20

– Critical (introduction & intellectual) biography
malcontents
Stoned spermatozoa
The proximity of opposites
Non-academic thinkers
tabes
lurch
Lecture as public conversation
Screen memory

– Believe-IN the IM-possible

– Was Dostoevsky a Christian?

– familycide

26.2.20

– hendiadys
Maharishi Dayanand Saraswathi
Shivaji Jayanti
International Mother Tongue Day ~ Maha Shivaratri
Meatfare Sunday

– Intensities ~passions ~ sufferings ~ extremities

28.2.20

– Nataraja – dancing on my own grave!

3.3.20

– Flexible skeleton
armature
Negative shape
Foreshortened view
Gestural line
Atmospheric perspective
Linear perspective
Interior space

– Learning how to see

4.3.20

– The mistake I made in the previous retreat (Body-focus) was to allow language back into the game!
The sharing sessions should have been limited to only non-verbal forms of expression & communication ☝🏽

6.3.20

– “I will be right here”

7.3.20

– The celebration of boredom

10.3.20

– Double entendre

– “Ok what’s the ultimate goal
By doing or being in the pursuit of something if it’s makes u happy I totally agree
But if u get lost in the process n find urself unhappy what’s the purpose of it” – XYZ

“To experience life in all its fullness (with no distinction between “positive” & “negative”) and grow in understanding (in-depth and impartial)
Ah! I’m against “happiness” as the goal ❌
What if the lostness is just a realization of one’s current state??” – ABC

BROWSING

15.1.20

– Fake celebrities

18.1.20

– Movies:
“Marriage Story”
Why this title?!
Did they ever try marital counseling before going for divorce? Doesn’t look like a couple who’s beyond hope.
Commitment cannot survive, if chemistry & communication are not nurtured. Is adjustment a fourth element or is it also a part of communication?

“Ford vs. Ferrari”
WOW! Action-drama
Passion – I don’t know if I will ever find mine, before it’s too late……
Maybe I am called to transcend purpose itself, but I might not be up to that level of crazy.
My 7,000 rpm ~ stoned (weed)
I’m Ken miles, leading and then accompanying, the other 2 Ford drivers (Chris, Solan, Shanthuru, etc.) – is this just hubris??

19.1.20

– Cinematic texts
Diacritics
Alienation & instrumentalization
Postmodern Marxism
Demystification & undermining
Ethology
Umwelt
Intransigent contingency
ISA – ideological state apparatuses
curmudgeon
truncheon
Althusserian

– “All I know is that I am not a Marxist.” – Karl Marx

21.1.20

– I’m neither a conformist nor an activist.
Maybe that’s why I’m depressed……!
Most people find happiness by losing themselves in certain things (roles, values, activities, achievements, relationships, etc.), but maybe I am called to suffer living with myself forever.
One can only look at oneself naked in the mirror for so long, without going insane……

– barf
git

– Content ~ conscious
&
Form ~ unconscious

– Pornography & the Lacanian image-inary
Developmental psychology
Vs.
The symbolic self (Lacanian arbitrary/slippery/tentative ego)

24.1.20

– TV series:
“Mr. Robot”
Psycho-analysis, cyber-world & multiverse – could all this be overlapping somehow?
An explicit, articulated & evolving theory/theology/spirituality, along with the personal, relational & political aspects of the story, could make it more complete…
Just as psychology can be seen as the basis of philosophy, the opposite is also true!
Sentimentality is meaningful only in the context of ultimate concern(s).

– synaxis

WASSUP

6.12.19
– Zombie apocalypse
ostensibly
Deuteronomistic history
A worthy opponent to God
Minority monotheism
Political theology – God/sovereignty ~ King/government
entourage
sporadic
Plausible deniability
Impersonal instrumentalization
“Necessary part of the divine plan”
Fruitless repentance
– The study of evil – Pornology?
And could this also be graphic in form? 😉
– “How can absence or lack (in oneself) be a generative and creative force (in the world)?” – Peter Rollins
Great question!!! 👏
– Evil as avoidable/unnecessary suffering
– Jazz clapping
– Am I a coward/sissy?! Can I directly (face-to-face/in-person) confront others when necessary & appropriate?
7.12.19
– “The blood of the martyrs is the seed of the church”!
A radical & subversive (but not new) approach to taking down the “powers” 💪🏽
– “Rest in pieces” – Ikon Community
8.12.19
– Movies:
“Party” (Hindi, 1984) – WOW… too close to home! Setting up each character separately in their own homes and then bringing them all together to the party is explosive. Am I part of the bourgeois elite? Compare with “Between Us” (2012) – watched in annual retreat 2014 @ Kolli Hills
“கைதி” – not as good as I expected – it was right to watch “Jallikattu” in the cinema instead of this. Contrived sentimentality.
“அசுரன்” – more action than drama… When government and civil society (NGOs & media) fail – revert to animality! Again, not up to the mark, for me.
– whitepaper
9.12.19
– Movies:
“Parasite”
But what about the middle class?? Ah! Joe, always the typical bourgeoisie…
Horror-comedy
Who are the parasites – the poor or the rich or both or neither or……?!
– 3 highs in 1 day:
Intellectual, erotic & shopping!
– I am (little) excited about shifting to SRM AP! And this surprises me…… 😜
10.12.19
– mnemonics
acrostic
– Re-education/indoctrination/detention camps
internment (double meaning)
reverie
– What can people do when violated by very powerful forces, like the government?
1. Appeal to other agencies like the media, activist NGOs, international organizations (E.g. UN, etc.)
2. Intellectual & ethical counter – public ideological response through own resources. Educate, organize & agitate.
3. Violent defense!
11.12.19
– QIP
AGR
stagflation
Modular living
Bellingcat
– 4th dimension – I await the opening up of an inward/spiritual realm that is far greater (more vast & rich) than the outer/social world……!
Will I ever see that Day?? 😐😶🤨
12.12.19
– clearinghouse
13.12.19
– trippy; psychonaut; flow
Microdosing experiment
Unusual connections
What happens if you combine a conventional anti-depessant (like Escitalopram) with a psychedelic (like Marijuana)?!
“What is it that you have (recently) discovered is easier/simpler than you expected?”
Ayelet Waldeman
Meditation evangelist
16.12.19
– bobbitise
17.12.19
– Movies:
“Baskin” (Turkish)
The dream within the dream, is real!
Watched this while reading “The Prince of this World” by Adam Kotsko!
19.12.19
– priggish
25.12.19
– Born to suffer,
Born to die,
Born to save…
MERRY CHRISTMAS to all the losers!
The babe in the manger – divine + human + animal, all in one scene!
The presence of GOD in the lowliest & filthiest of human conditions – there is no dark corner of existence which the Light has not invaded……
The divine, as the invisible & eternal dimension of human nature!
(…or the human as the visible & temporal manifestation of the divine)
9.1.20
– Curative petition
– My scale for hourly pay:
Unskilled labor ~ Rs. 100
Skilled labor ~ Rs. 250
– 3 types of change to be anticipated in 2020:
1. To be changed by one’s life events & situation
2. To intentionally work on oneself and one’s sphere of influence (includes relationships)
3. To create revolution in the world by organized work with others
1 & 3 are much closer than it might seem!
10.1.20
– Spiritual activism & political contemplation
14.1.20
– Do you know why/how the heart can beat incessantly for an entire lifetime?
Because, it doesn’t!
– New Year sermon:
The angels sang, the Magi adored, and the shepherds exclaimed, but Mary pondered……!
GOD as present Absence
– What do I do with my WhatsApp status when I am numb & dumb??
Are all these ejaculations into the void “my ministry”?!
– Movies:
“Anand” (1971, Hindi)
Embrace grief, fuck depression!
Bliss ~ ecstatic neutrality
– Any way I can share my Facebook story archive on my blog?

JOTTINGS

27.11.19

– Be gentle with your machine!

28.11.19

– Movies:
“Mr. Turner”
Or should I say, “Mr. Leigh”?
The ultra-ordinary seer!
“Subtly terrific”
frangibility
A portrait of a landscape painter?

– The judgment of salvation
&
The salvation of judgment

– Repurposing counter-revolution

29.11.19

– MK-Ultra
Identity theft

1.12.19

– Between Christ the King & Advent – Meta-kingdom!
The King of kings Vs. the kings of the people
Waiting ~ hoping ~ hastening!
Rejoicing in, & preparing for, the Coming
“Our salvation is closer now, than when we first believed…!”

2.12.19

– Brutal love

– Art as meta-science & science as para-art
Declutter
From perplexity to wonder
Differentiate curd & yogurt

3.12.19

– Hauntological melancholy
immiseration
Negative solidarity
bankrolling
scenius
conurbation

– demur

– Firefox is definitely far better than Chrome!

5.12.19

– Infographic edification
Constitutional amendment
speakeasy

– winterbus
Decbus
Bigbus
Ride2gether
Do you know what these are??

– Perichoretic dance model:
1. What the situation requires (chores)
2. What I feel/like (desire/need)
3. What I ought (disciplines)
Each taking their turn in the centre, while the other 2 retreat, for the time being!
Variety & balance – among activities in the same category & in between categories